Short Story: LFG

|ir0nbard has entered the channel
Prince4lyfe: Sup ir0n
ir0nbard: the sky
Prince4lyfe:
DeirdreMasters:
ir0nbard: srsly tho theres another dragon about u guys wanna come slay it with me
Prince4lyfe: Not really, no.
ir0nbard: …no?
ir0nbard: what do u mean no?
DeirdreMasters: You need this explaining iron? After the last time?
ir0nbard: guys we slayed that last dragon without a hitch
DeirdreMasters: Without a hitch? That dragon only went down because of your leggings.
ir0nbard: that wasn’t a hitch
ir0nbard: guys
Prince4lyfe: Those leggings were effective for one reason and one reason only…
ir0nbard: IT WORKED FIVE DAMMIT
|ir0nbard has been kicked by PKbot – reason: no need to shout!
|ir0nbard has entered the channel
ir0nbard: it worked Five dammit
DeirdreMasters: Heard you the first time.
DeirdreMasters: Well. Read you.
Prince4lyfe: In any case, no. In fact, we’d rather you’d leave this one to professionals
|imawizardmary has entered the channel
Prince4lyfe: Preferably ones with single-purpose weaponry, too
imawizardmary: see were back to bitching about ir0ns guitar-rifle again?
|Prince4lyfe sighs
Prince4lyfe: Yes. Yes we are.
ir0nbard: whats wrong with my guitar-rifle?
ir0nbard: guys
ironbard: WHATS WRONG WIT IT>>
|ir0nbard has been kicked by PKbot – reason: no need to shout!
|ir0nbard has entered the channel
imawizardmary: ir0n
imawizardmary: chill
ir0nbard: what
ir0nbard: oh
imawizardmary: seriously though, your axecannon or whatevers fine
imawizardmary: just needs some enchanting is all
Prince4lyfe: Wiz…
ir0nbard: i dont want it enchanting
Prince4lyfe: Aren’t you forgetting something?
ir0nbard: enchantings for cowards
imawizardmary: am i?
|ir0nbard has been kicked by Prince4lyfe – reason: We don’t call people cowards, ir0n
Prince4lyfe: Yes. Yes you are.
|ir0nbard has entered the channel
|Prince4lyfe glares at wiz
imawizardmary:
imawizardmary: oh
imawizardmary: oh yeah
imawizardmary: what happened with that anyway?
Prince4lyfe: Had to shell out for a new rifle, thank you very gods damned much.
DeirdreMasters: The warranty didn’t cover modification damage, basically.
DeirdreMasters: Including magic-based.
imawizardmary: oh
imawizardmary: sorry
imawizardmary: ill pay you back for it i swear
|Prince4lyfe rolls his eyes
imawizardmary: what?
Prince4lyfe: Nothing.
Prince4lyfe: Just see to it that you do.
DeirdreMasters: Daddy’s pissed.
Prince4lyfe: …Thanks, Dee.
DeirdreMasters: Welcome!
ir0nbard: wiz
imawizardmary: what?
ir0nbard: u wanna help me slay a dragon
ir0nbard: use the reward to pay for Prince’s gun
imawizardmary: i dont know…
imawizardmary: ooh good idea iron
Prince4lyfe: Woah, hey, wiz. I’d prefer it if you lived long enough to pay me back, yeah?
imawizardmary: ill be fine.
DeirdreMasters: You, wiz, who manages to blow the wrong things up, and incontinence bard…
DeirdreMasters: Against a dragon.
imawizardmary: ill be fine!!
DeirdreMasters: That’ll end well, I’m sure.
|Prince4lyfe sighs
DeirdreMasters: Stop abusing the emote command, brother.
Prince4lyfe: Stop telling me how to use MY channel, sister.
|DeirdreMasters pouts
Prince4lyfe: Okay, fine. I’ll come with you, ir0n.
ir0nbard: woot
Prince4lyfe: But I’m bringing some backup this time.
ir0nbard: srsly
ir0nbard: we dont need backup
Prince4lyfe: And I don’t need to be greeting the gods soaked in your fear-pee.
ir0nbard:
ir0nbard: fine
Prince4lyfe: Good.
Prince4lyfe: Now that that’s clear, I want as good a description of the dragon we’re about to going up against.
ir0nbard: why
Prince4lyfe: Description, ir0n.
Prince4lyfe: Now.
ir0nbard: all i know is that its big it flies and its red
DeirdreMasters: Uh…
Prince4lyfe: Last sighting?
ir0nbard: what
Prince4lyfe: Where was it last sighted, ir0n?
ir0nbard: north of jaunty rock
ir0nbard: greenhawk mountains
ir0nbard: i think
imawizardmary: joining dee in uh-ing here.
Prince4lyfe: Yeah, okay.
ir0nbard: lets go kill it already
Prince4lyfe: Just one thing, ir0n.
ir0nbard: what
Prince4lyfe: We can’t kill this dragon.
ir0nbard: why not
Prince4lyfe: WE JUST CAN’T!
|Prince4lyfe has been kicked by PKbot – reason: no need to shout!
|Prince4lyfe has entered the channel
|Prince4lyfe has disabled PKbot rule: noshout
Prince4lyfe: That didn’t happen.
DeirdreMasters: Yes it did.
|DeirdreMasters has been kicked by Prince4lyfe – reason: It didn’t.
|DeirdreMasters has entered the channel
DeirdreMasters: Hey!
ir0nbard: why cant we slay the dragon
Prince4lyfe: We have an understanding.
ir0nbard: what
imawizardmary: hes a cool guy ir0n
ir0nbard: hes a dragon
ir0nbard: dragons are bad
ir0nbard: remember
DeirdreMasters: Yeah, that’s like saying all humans are bad because a few of them turn out to be bloodythirsty serial killers.
DeirdreMasters: See where I’m going with this?
|Switchfyre has entered the channel
ir0nbard: ALL DRAGONS ARE BAD
ir0nbard: ITS IN THERE NATURE AND EVERYTHING
Prince4lyfe:
Switchfyre: I came online at a bad time, didn’t I?
Prince4lyfe: Five preserve me…
Prince4lyfe: Don’t mind ir0n, Switch. He’s a little…
Prince4lyfe: …well…
DeirdreMasters: Dense?
Prince4lyfe: Dee!
Switchfyre: This got awkward fast.
ir0nbard: wtf
ir0nbard: the dragons here
imawizardmary: ir0n…
ir0nbard: the dragons here on this channel right now wtf what is wrong with you
Prince4lyfe: ir0n, calm… down.
ir0nbard: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
Prince4lyfe: ir0n…
|ir0nbard has left the channel – reason: screw you guys i’ll go slay him myself
DeirdreMasters:
Switchfyre: Guess he’s after me, then.
Prince4lyfe: Yep.
Switchfyre: You really need to choose your friends more carefully.
Prince4lyfe: Yep.
Switchfyre: And correct him on my gender and all when he gets back.
Prince4lyfe: Yep.
imawizardmary: wait.
imawizardmary: youre female?
Prince4lyfe: Yep.
Switchfyre: Yep.
imawizardmary: that i did not know.
|imawizardmary changed their name to imanidiotmary
imanidiotmary: also how are you even typing?
imanidiotmary: your arms are your wings.
Switchfyre: Speech dick taters.
imanidiotmary: 0_0
Switchfyre: Five donut.
Switchfyre: Five damn it.
Switchfyre: Speech dictation.

 

Author’s note: What? Those fantasy realms aren’t going to remain on the same level of technology for the rest of their existence, are they?

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